Uncovering Core Motivations

by Jim Remley, Pro Performer Seminars

Real estate buyers and sellers can be odd ducks. Some want what they can't have -- I want $1,000,000 dollars for my single wide mobile home and not a penny less! Others demand crazy concessions -- I want this toaster oven but they can keep all the clocks in the house. A few will cook up hairball schemes -- Let's offer them half what their asking, and go down from there. Occasionally they hide things -- Bankruptcy? I thought that we took care of that last month. And more clients than you would guess will flat out lie to you -- Fire? No we just barbeque inside during the winter. As Jim Morrison of the Doors was fond of singing "People are strange." They are.

A few years ago a good friend of mine John confided in me after a house warming party he had thrown to celebrate the completion of his four thousand square foot water front home -- "As nice as this is, I know in a few months I'll be wishing I had something bigger, and better." At first blush you might say to yourself -- Oh, how sad, the poor devil will never be satisfied. But take a look inward for a moment and ask yourself if are you completely satisfied with where you live. What you drive. What clothes you wear. Perhaps we aren't so different from John, and his constant need for more, bigger, and better. This is the people paradox. We always want what we don't, or can't have. Fulfillment for many of us is never in the here and now it's just around the bend, over the next hill, just out of reach. Is this a bad thing? Probably not as our inner drive, our hard wired ambition is exactly what allows us to succeed and survive in a highly competitive world.

We need to understand the underlying motivations of each of our clients -- Why they buy and sell homes. You might think that buying a home is simply a matter of getting a roof over your head or some shelter. Or perhaps you might think people are looking for safety -- because a home provides us with a certain degree of security from the outside world. But in my experience both answers would be wrong. Why? As one of the fortunate few who live in the richest countries in the world very few of us are in danger of losing at least basic shelter. Nearly all of us will have a roof over our heads every night of our lives. So the question isn't if we will have shelter but what kind of shelter?

I learned this valuable lesson the first year of my second marriage. My new bride and I had taken a road trip to visit some family in Washington State, where we had planned to picnic along the Columbia River and enjoy a summer day on the water fishing and swimming. Unfortunately after driving several hundred miles up and down the river I got very lost. (My later defense - It is the largest river in the Pacific Northwest at over 1200 miles long!) By night fall we gave up on finding my family.

Frustrated, tired, and irritated we pulled into a small town along the river which had two hotels. The first was a brand new multi-story waterfront hotel. From a distance the place was lit up like a Wal-Mart at Christmas and strangely after all those hours of driving, searching, fighting and fatigue it gave us that same sense of warmth, joy, and euphoria.

We couldn't help but smile. Through the window we could see that a fire was blazing in the new lobby, hot coffee was steaming from an oversized pot, and the gleaming white teeth of the cashier beckoned us to come on in. But this is where I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life -- I kept on driving. The place looked expensive I thought to myself, after all we just need a place to sleep for a few hours.

"Let's see what's down the road."

What was down the road was my new bride's worst nightmare, an old fashioned Motor Lodge. In its day it must have been an incredibly plush hotel, with the wood panel walls, free standing ashtrays, and clown inspired paintings. But now it just looked old, and tired (but cheap!). Although the lobby was closed they did have a night bell, and the flickering sign outside did say "vacancy."

"No," My new wife pronounced. It wasn't a discussion, it was a decision.

I guess as a recent bachelor I just hadn't come full circle yet as to what adequate shelter would mean to my new wife. That night I learned - four walls and roof? Not even close to good enough.

For most Americans owning a home isn't about shelter. It's not about staying dry, or out of the weather, or keeping the wolves from coming in, it's about something much deeper -- something that is beyond physiological needs, and deeply seated in psychological needs. Four walls and a roof do not make a home (or a hotel). Reflect for a moment about your last home purchase or sale. What motivated you to make that life changing decision?

Actualization
^l Move to better reflect lifestyle.
^l  Move to accomodate personal growth.
^l  Move to change life direction.

Esteem
^l  Move based on promotion or increased income.
^l  Move to match self image change.
^l  Move to keep up with social circle.

Love/Belonging
^l  Move closer to family or friends.
^l  Move to accommodate family -- size of home.
^l  Move to meet needs of family members.

Inner Motivations: The core motivation for making a real estate change.

Outside Motivations: The surface needs that serve the inner motivation.

Like you, each of your clients has a core motivation. But here's the rub-- many of your clients won't themselves realize what it is they are truly seeking. Sure they know the outside motivations, those surface issues that they present you with as they walk through your office doors like -- We need a third car garage, or we want to live in Laurelwood, or we want to be closer to the center of town. But they haven't yet grasped (and may never grasp) their own inner needs, their core motivations for making a real estate change. Instead these deeper needs remain untapped, repressed, and unspoken. So how do superstars uncover this hidden agenda? Many start by using a simple technique I call the Three-Way technique.

The Three-Way technique is a quick way to diagnose our potential client's core motivations. Not unlike doctors, great presenters evaluate each potential client by probing, narrowing, and exploring the symptoms of what ails their patients. In other words they quickly find their client's pain. Let's take a look at the Three-Way technique in action:

The Three-Way Technique
The key to this system is to always ask at least three questions during any initial conversation with a new potential buyer or seller client to reveal their true motivations and determine if you want to continue building the relationship. For instance:

Buyer: Yeah, I'm looking for a three bedroom in the country, around $200,000.

(Weak Agent: Great, I'm not doing anything now. How soon can I pick you up and starting showing you homes? )

Strong Agent: Great, do you mind if I ask you why you're looking for a three bedroom and not a four?

Buyer: Well we have a new baby on the way and we are in a two bedroom now, but we would take a four bedroom if we could find one.

Strong Agent: Terrific, and why the country? Did you grow up on a few acres?

Buyer: No, but my wife grew up on a ranch and she wants our new son to grow up on some property.

Strong Agent: Great, and do you mind if I ask how you decided on looking in the $200,000 dollar range.

Three questions later and this agent has discovered that this couple's core motivation is to provide a rural environment for their son to grow up in. They're moving because they want to create a loving environment for their son that reminds them of their childhood. This skilled agent knows she isn't selling bedrooms and bathrooms she's selling something far more precious -- a special place for this couple to raise their new baby.

In the end none of us sell square footage; we also don't sell split levels, condos, ranch style homes, or ranches instead we sell the way buying or selling real estate makes a person feel. We sell emotions.

About the Author: Jim Remley is a speaker, author, and consultant. He is also an active real estate broker in Southern Oregon where he owns a network of twelve offices. Jim won the Rookie Instructor of the Year award in 2001 from Realty-U, the largest network of real estate educators in the nation. Jim is also the author of the Accredited Luxury Home Specialist (ALHS) designation which is managed by the Luxury Home Council. His new book Make Millions Selling Real Estate (AMACOM/2005) is available now at retailers nationwide. To learn more about Jim please visit www.properformer.com or email him at jim@properformer.com.